Sunday, May 11, 2014

PHONY BOLOGNA

Do you recall when one learned to spell a brand bologna as b-o-l-o-n-g-a? It was a catchy TV commercial jingle.

Bologna was a staple lunch item in my mom’s refrigerator. Not the brand kind, but the kind she would ask the deli counter person to slice for her. Thin. Not shavings, not thick but thin. And if she ever sent her eldest helper out to the deli for bologna, it had to be thin. Not shavings, not thick but thin.

If you have children or are surrounded by little ones on a regular basis, you may have had this similar experience when children go through food jags. They will only eat one item, repeatedly, for what seems to be an eternity.

I was no different. Every day, my lunch would be a bologna sandwich because I wanted it that way. Mom would say “the day will come that you will not want to look at another bologna sandwich” but that day did could not come soon enough for her.

She would serve it daily on two slices of round white bread that mom would buy daily at the bakery, with a thin layer of mayo. The round bologna deli slice fit perfectly on the round bread. No deli meat to tuck in because a square slice of meat on a round slice of bread was just like putting a square peg in a round hole.

There was no deviation except for Fridays. Fridays were relegated to peanut butter and jelly or cream cheese and jelly. Not by my choice, but by religious upbringing. Fridays were meatless, therefore, no bologna.

That day did eventually come when I could not look at or eat one more bologna sandwich. Instead, my new food jag was liverwurst. Yes, another perfectly round slice of deli meat on a perfectly round slice of white bread with a thin layer of mayo, every day.

Today, my taste for bologna is not as ravenous as when I was a child. Now, I buy phony bologna. It has turkey in it. The grown up version is on square bread, with cheese, mayo on the meat side, tomato if available, then grilled until gooey. Okay, so gooey is not an adult word but then again, my spelling of bologna is still b-o-l-o-g-n-a.

SOUND THE BUGLE! Today’s tip: The price of fresh sliced deli meat from behind the counter is exorbitant for my budget. If I must buy fresh sliced deli meat, I order the exact number of thin slices that I will need for my sandwiches. Add some crunch and texture (read as extender!) to your sandwich with lettuce and toasted bread. For some sandwiches (ham and cheese), thinly sliced apples will work too!
                                                          GRILLING EQUIPMENT
 

                                       TURKEY BOLOGNA and SWISS CHEESE

 
HAMBURGER BUNS FOR THE "ROUND" EFFECT


 

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